R-E-S-P-E-C-T

(Note: In accordance with long-standing tradition* in the blogosphere, I'm going to use a pseudonym rather than the person's real name. (*One does not use real names unless the person is a public figure or one has that person's permission.))

A while back, some fool left a snarky comment about "hook-ups" on a friend's Facebook page. I found that offensive in the extreme and left a note to the effect that my friend (hereinafter known as "Wonder Woman") doesn't "hook-up".

Early yesterday morning, I got a nice little note from her, thanking me for my comment and agreeing that the original comment was out of line and disrespectful. I wrote back and reminded her that respect is the foundation for all relationships among Germans.

And thereby hangs a tale. Or at least a blog post.

I've probably already blogged about my philosophy on what constitutes a friend. Hint: it's not someone I've known for 15 minutes. It takes longer. But I'm not sure if I got around to exploring what goes into friendship. Most of it is pretty basic. But respect plays a much larger role than most people realize. Bottom line: if I can't respect you, you can't be my friend. And the way to be respected is to be respectable. Maybe we can get along. Maybe we can even share a joke or two. But friends? Uh-uh. People I can't respect are forever relegated to the Aquaintance Zone.

Many years ago, when I was sentenced to stationed at Maxwell AFB, there was a kid in my Ward who was some kind of Homecoming Queen or whatever. Everyone else fawned all over her like she was All That And A Bag Of Chips. I was completely underwhelmed. Grudgingly, I had to concede that she was "a good member of the Church" (as though that's some sort of bona fides). And I was content to leave it at that. Until one fine day.

One Saturday, the singles had a picnic at the lake. And guess who shows up wearing a one-piece bathing suit that left nothing to the imagination? So much for being "a good member of the Church". Kind of hard for me to work up any respect for someone like that. (The only redeeming feature was that she didn't have anything worth looking at anyway.)

Now, why is it I respect Wonder Woman when we've never even met? Easy -- it's because she has always behaved in a respectable manner. Quite apart from her obvious intelligence, her charm, her whacky sense of humor, and countless other qualities, she commands respect. She affords others a dignity that they do not always reciprocate. So far as I've seen, her actions have been above reproach. And so it's easy for me to respect her -- she's a respectable person. I love people like that.

Too bad there aren't more such people in this world.