De' fliengde Vuogtlänn'r

Observations, rants, etc. from a guy who really gets around.

6.9.05

264 Non-Critical Days

You thought you were safe just 'cause you survived the "101 Critical Days" of summer? Well, bunky, we're not out of the unsafe woods yet...

We hear so much about the 101 Critical Days of Summer -- that time from Memorial Day to Labor Day -- in which danger lurks around every corner. Indeed, we are bombarded ad nauseum with reminders about driving safely, drinking plenty of liquids (non-alcoholic, of course), and applying twelve or more coats of sunscreen with a minimum SPF of 1,000,000. Things like auto accidents, water safety mishaps, sunburn warnings, bug bite awareness, barbeque grill alerts -- you get the message. You'd think it wasn't safe to poke your head outside! Yet magically, these dangers apparently disappear with the onset of September. No one drowns, no one drinks to excess, and no one gets hurt (except for an occasional shark bite).

We get caught up in the "thank God Summer is over" hype. But as the Crocodile Hunter says, "Danger, danger, danger!" Just look at what awaits us during the 264 Non-Critical Days...

First, it's an established fact that office and school injuries skyrocket during Fall. Paper cuts and stubbed toes claim thousands of victims. Chiropractors report a two-fold increase in back injuries due to out-of-shape clients raking foliage.

Many of us fare no better during Winter. Frostbite accidents not withstanding, injuries from freak accidents abound. Last year, there were over 100 documented cases of tongues frozen to pump handles. And we need not even speak about the countless children mauled by startled reindeer.

OK, so Spring comes and we all feel safer. Not so. Only six short months ago, a group of Minnesotans lost their lives while attempting to drive an SUV over a lake to go ice fishing. Unfortunately, the lake was in Florida.

Folks, we need to be vigilant during these 264 Non-Critical Days. Too many lives are at stake. Remember, safety isn't just a concern. It's an obsession.

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