De' fliengde Vuogtlänn'r

Observations, rants, etc. from a guy who really gets around.


State Of The Union Show

OK, this was just too good to pass up. For the sake of those not on LinkUp, someone seems to have gotten ahold of an advance copy of the President's speech for tonight.


A Death In The Family

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Mr. Common Sense. Mr. Sense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valued lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge).

His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Mr. Sense declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student, but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge financial settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two step-brothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on; if not, join the majority and do nothing

Welcome to 2006

You know you're living in 2006 when....

1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on-line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check to see if there is a #9 on this list.



Tag. I'm It.

Good thing I finally got back on the 'Net. My friend Bonfire tagged me with (yet another!) quiz, so I'll have get that out of the way before I can call it a day and hit the rack.

Four jobs I've had (I assume any four):
Janitor (in high school)
Driver/guard for Wells Fargo (Salt Lake City)
Military (29½ years)
Construction warehouseman

Four Places I've lived:
Baltimore, MD (born there)
Provo, UT
Albuquerque, NM
Chattanooga, TN

Four movies I'd watch again:
Any Star Wars movie
The Man Who Would Be King
Cool Runnings
I Married a Monster From Outer Space
(only the original, with Gloria Talbot)

Four TV shows I love to watch:
Veronica Mars
Special Report with Britt Hume

Four of my favorite foods:
Green chile stew
Kung Pao Chicken

Four places I'd rather be right now:
Mesa, AZ
Albuquerque, NM
Auerbach im Vogtland
Provo, UT

Four Bloggers I'd like to tag:
)(urley Gurley