De' fliengde Vuogtlänn'r

Observations, rants, etc. from a guy who really gets around.

30.11.07

Hot Chocolate

(Hat tip to Mag, from whom I so shamelessly ripped it off.)

A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired. During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guests hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups -- porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain-looking, some expensive, some exquisite -- telling them to help themselves to the hot chocolate.


When they all had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said: "Notice that all the nice-looking, expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. The cup that you're drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases, it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup; but you consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing each other's cups.

Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life. The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of life you have. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate God has provided us. God makes the hot chocolate, man chooses the cups. The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything that they have.

22.11.07

Tag, I'm It

Lauren tagged me with yet another of those little quizzes. I think someone else got me before, but I never followed thru. So.... Here are the rules:

A. Each player lists 6 facts/habits about themselves that nobody knows.

B. At the end of the post, the player then tags 6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

Random facts about me:
1. I've been in all the Lower 48 States.

2. I've served in all three components of the Air Forrce -- Regular Air Force (often mistakenly referred to as "active duty"), the Air National Guard, and the Air Force Reserve.

3. I can talk like Donald Duck.

4. My normal temperature is 96.8, not 98.6 like "most" people.

5. I once crawled up into the overhead luggage bin on a Greyhound bus and took a nap.

6. I can breathe with my toes.

Now I need to pick 6 victims other people to do this. I'll have to think about it.

Update: I've tagged RS, Deuceman, Rationalguy, Dulce, Daisy Paige, and MandaPanda. Let's see who else comes thru besides RS.

20.11.07

Please Don't Squeeze The Coffin

He wasn't one of the greats, but Dick Wilson (a.k.a. "Mr Whipple") passed away today at the age of 91. Amidst all the really annoying ads on TV, his was actually rather funny.

19.11.07

Dear Diary....

For anyone who's owned a cat or a dog...

Excerpts From A Dog's Diary

Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
1:30 PM - ooooooo. bath. bummer
4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

~~~

Excerpts From A Cat's Diary

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow, I might eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 - Today, my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair... must try this on their bed.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm... not working according to plan.

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason, I was chosen for the water torture. This time, however, it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo". What sick minds could invent such a liquid? My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies". Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.

2.11.07

A Royal Pain

Someone deserves a medal for this. Click on "Watch The Report". The best part is ~2 minutes into it.