De' fliengde Vuogtlänn'r

Observations, rants, etc. from a guy who really gets around.

29.9.05

Whither the Weather?

"Climate is what you expect. Weather is what you get." -- Mark Twain

OK, could someone explain to me how the 7:00am temperature was 72° and the projected high for the day is 71°? (It's 66° as I write this.)

And it's still not autumn yet. Despite the fact that I had a mug of hot chocolate for breakfast (I'm not wearing a long-sleeved shirt). In fact, that one was so good, I had another for lunch.

My recipe: I use Swiss Miss (preferably their Chocolate Sensations mix), add in 1½ tablespoons of raw cocoa and about a tablespoon of hazelnut-flavored non-dairy creamer. Mix thoroughly, add in enough hot water to make a thin paste, mix well and top off with 2% milk. Nuke until hot.

Dang... I just might have another.

27.9.05

My Achin' Back....

OK, so I moved everything out of my 5x5 storage locker and into a 5x10, setting up a 5-tier shelving unit in the process. I figured it would take me two hours to do. It took three.

Now I've got a date with some Aleve, the shower, and a vibrating back pillow.

At least I got things better organized. But I still have to go back and re-arrange a few things in a couple of days.

26.9.05

I'm OK; You're OK

Ah, yes.... nothing like '70s psycho-babble. Would you believe that as late as 2002, they were actually teaching this crap at the Air Force Senior NCO Academy? Three hours worth of it. Of course, it needs a little updating and refining. So, herewith we have Transactional Analysis according to....

Red Foreman: "I'm OK, you're a dumb-ass"

Oprah Winfrey: "I'm OK, you're OK; and it's all in this book we'll be discussing on my show tomorrow.

Woody Allen: "I'm not OK, you're OK. At least, I don't think I'm OK. Do you think I'm OK? I mean, do you think I might be OK? Do you think a guy like me could ever be OK?"

Al Gore: "I'm OK, but I'm not sure you're OK. I want a re-count."

Ross Perot: "I'm OK, and as these charts show, you're pretty much OK, although you have some areas that need improvement."

Arnold Schwarzenegger: "I'll be OK. I'll be back to see if you're OK."

Britney Spears: "I'm OK. That's all that really matters, isn't it?"

David Nolan*: "I'm OK. You're OK as long as you don't harm anyone else."
(*Founder of the Libertarian Party)

Walter Cronkite: "I'm OK, you're OK. And that's the way it is."

Josef Stalin: "I'm OK. You're only OK as long as you toe the party line. Otherwise, you'll be taken out and shot."

R2D2: "#$%^!& %^&*@{ †âð‘_ ÷²¦ç¤’ טžô`ö^æ ªæîý!"

J. Edgar Hoover: "I'm OK, but I've got my eye on you."

Master Doh-San: "I am I. You are you. OK?"

Rush Limbaugh: "Of course I'm OK and you're OK. And we'd be a lot more OK if we could just get those liberals to leave us alone."

Alan Greenspan: "I'm OK, you'll be OK as soon as we lower interest rates."

Hillary Clinton: "I'm OK. It'll take a village to make you OK."

Osama bin-Laden: "Only Allah is OK, you infidel swine!"

25.9.05

Nope, Not Yet

One of the few positive things about Hurricane Rita was that it caused all the weather wonks to skip over the annual nonsense about how yesterday was (the first full day of autumn". 'Cause it wasn't.

Not yet.

Autumn doesn't officially begin until the day that I do two things: start the day with a mug of hot chocolate, and wear a long-sleeved shirt. Both are a ways off. At least a week.

Be patient. I'll let you know.

23.9.05

Fitness Update -- September 2005

02 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 204

03 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 204

04 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
No isometrics
This morning's weight: 203

06 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 203

07 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 203 (Hope to be 202 tomorrow)

08 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 202! (Woo-hoo!! I knew I'd make it!)

09 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 201!?!? (How the heck did I do that?! Oh, yeah... I walked all over downtown Chattanooga. And I'll have to do that again this afternoon, when I go pick up the bus from the mechanic.)

10 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 201

11 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
No isometrics
This morning's weight: 201

12 September

I don't usually update this on Mondays, because I don't work out on Sundays. However..... this morning, I was down to 200 pounds! Woo-hoo! Yay me! Only 20 more pounds to go.

13 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 200

14 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 200

15 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
No isometrics
This morning's weight: 199! (Whoo-hoo! Finally broke the 200-pound barrier! Too bad Joy dropped me off her list, or I'd post this on the Highlight of The Day thread.)

16 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 199

17 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 198?? What the...? How the heck did I do that?

18 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
No isometrics (too worn out)
This morning's weight: 197???

20 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 196???

21 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 195???

22 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 195

23 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 195

24 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 196(???) (Pfui!) :-(

25 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 196

27 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 196

28 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 195

29 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 195

30 September
Yesterday's work-out:
Distance walked: 4.4 miles (with leg weights but no vest)
Push-ups: 150
Sit-ups: 150
Did the usual isometrics
This morning's weight: 195

01 October
Yesterday's work-out:
None (not feeling well)
This morning's weight: 195

16.9.05

Money: The Root of All Evil (And Much Stupidity)

After I graduated from high school, I got a job in a department store, working in the men's department. One evening, as I was making change for a customer, I noticed a strange-looking coin in with the quarters. I exchanged a quarter of my own for it and put it in my pocket. The next day, during lunch, I went to the bank and presented the coin to one of the tellers, asking what it was.

After consulting with a colleague, he came back and informed me that it was a Swedish krona. When I asked how much it was worth, he said "About 75 cents." I smiled, thanked him, and put the coin in my pocket.

I still have it.

Some people just don't know the worth of what they have.

14.9.05

The Candy Bar

Several years ago, I was in a large grocery store and found myself in line behind a man who had a young boy in tow. Without being specific, I'll merely say that both were members of an officially sanctioned minority group.

As I waited, I noticed that the boy in question was making every effort to steal a candy bar from the display rack. But what really got me was that the older one, instead of correcting him, kept trying to distract me by trying to make small talk. I was having none of it, and said nothing. I just kept my eyes on the boy. We were at an impasse. The boy couldn't steal the candy bar, because I was watching him like a hawk. The older one couldn't draw me into conversation, because I wouldn't speak. And I refused to do anything but watch the boy.

The longer we stood there, the more irritated I got. And the older guy was getting more and more irritated at me because I wouldn't respond to his attempts to draw me into conversation. It got to the point where I was just about to say "Instead of trying to distract me, why don't you tell this kid not to steal?".

Then I had a flash of inspiration. I know exactly one sentence in Swedish, and I used it. I looked the guy dead in the eye and said "Pratar du svenska?" ("Do you speak Swedish?"). The look on his face was priceless. As he took his change and started to turn to leave, he made some caustic comment about "foreigners coming here and don't even speak English".

As he walked out of the store, the clerk was nervously ringing up my purchases and glancing up at me. As soon as he was all the way out the door, I smiled at her and said "Don't worry. I speak fluent English. But that kid was trying to steal a candy bar, and he was trying to distract me." With a relieved smile, she thanked me.

13.9.05

"Hey!" Hell!

OK, I grew up in a different time and place. People actually had manners back then. The way I grew up, when you interrupt someone -- no matter what they're doing -- the first two words you should say are "Excuse me". A couple of years ago, one of my colleagues got a temporary asignment to Ramstein AB, Germany (near Kaiserslautern). Before he went, he aked me for any tips or advice I could pass along. I pased along a paper I had written quite some time ago, which included this advice: the four most important expressions you need to know when visiting a foreign country (where English is a foreign language) are "Excuse me", "Please", "Thank you", and "Do you speak English?".

Sadly, such niceties seem to have gone out of style. This morning, I was over at my favorite home improvement place and, as I was crossing the street, some uncouth moron pulls up in a car and stops and yells "Hey!" to get my attention.

Well, he got it. Just not in the way he had hoped. I stared for a second and said "'Hey!' hell! What kind of way is that to address someone?". And then I walked off.

Admittedly, there aren't a whole lot of things that will get my goat, but out-and-out rudeness is one of them.

11.9.05

Like An Old Shoe*

(*Heck of a way to refer to another human being, but bear with me.)

Some years back, when I was still a little airman no-class at Maxwell, I had a penpal in Oklahoma City. We had corresponded for some time before I got around to getting her phone number and caling her. That first phone call lasted for quite some time, but was a lot of fun. Somewhere in the next letters we exchanged, we both agreed that there was an odd familiarity in our phone conversation -- something akin to talking to an old friend one hadn't had contact with in a long time.

Recently, I had occasion to call another friend I've know for about a year or so. We've corresponded on-line for some time, but never spoken in person. It was occasioned by a minor emergency on her part and, although I had left a comment on her blog and fired off an e-mail, something nagged at me to call, lest she go off to take care of the problem without the information I had provided. Fortunately, I had her phone number, so I made the call. After kidding around a bit, I finally let on who it was and then passed on the information I had provided on-line.

After that, we chatted a bit, then I had the feeling I should let her go take care of stuff. During that conversation, though, an odd sense of Gemütlichkeit** settled over me, like talking with someone I talk with all the time. It was an odd mixture of comfortableness and familiarity.

Kind of like an old shoe.




**There's really no direction translation of this word. "Comfortableness" comes somewhat close, but it loses a lot in the translation.

6.9.05

"Ye$, Ma'am? Need $ome A$$i$tance?"

One of the things that really ticks me off in life is when I see people getting taken advantage of by the unscrupulous. Just recently, I read on a friend's blog that she's having car trouble. Sounds like something really simple, like maybe a loose alternator belt. No problem. That can be fixed in about 10 minutes. But I'd bet my next paycheck that if she took it into a dealer, they'd charge her an arm and a leg for doing next to nothing. Luckily, I had her phone number nad called to give her my diagnosis.

Even if I'm wrong, if she goes in there sounding like she knows what the problem is, maybe they won't take advantage of her.

Kind of reminds me of an incident back in '93 when my boss (a blonde!) bought a new computer for her office. Being blonde, she didn't think to either ask me first or take me along. So, she came back with some 386 machine with Window$ 3 loaded on it. Unfortunately, every time she ran a program, she had to re-boot, because the machine couldn't really handle Window$.

At my insistence, she called the Raunchy Store (*wink* *wink*) where she bought it and ragged on the manager a bit. The manager tried to weasel out of it by asking if Window$ would load when she invoked it. (Of course it does! It just won't do anything else!) When she took it back to the store, I went along. That's when I got to throw a little techno-babble at the manager and remind him that if Windows loaded but would not run any programs, it wouldn't really "run". In other words, it wouldn't run Windows the way the programmers intended for Windows to run. I also reminded him of a little legal term called "implied warrant of merchantability".

She walked out with a new computer.

At least I didn't need to use my rolled-up newspaper.

(Other than the sad news about the car, though, this morning's convo was a lot of fun. I didn't make it to the party last year, so we've never met in person. But this was the next best thing. Neat.)

Update: Found out that the car trouble was no more than a broken fan belt. Sweet. I hope that didn't cost much. Found out some more good news about the general situation, too, but it's not my place to mention any of that here.

264 Non-Critical Days

You thought you were safe just 'cause you survived the "101 Critical Days" of summer? Well, bunky, we're not out of the unsafe woods yet...

We hear so much about the 101 Critical Days of Summer -- that time from Memorial Day to Labor Day -- in which danger lurks around every corner. Indeed, we are bombarded ad nauseum with reminders about driving safely, drinking plenty of liquids (non-alcoholic, of course), and applying twelve or more coats of sunscreen with a minimum SPF of 1,000,000. Things like auto accidents, water safety mishaps, sunburn warnings, bug bite awareness, barbeque grill alerts -- you get the message. You'd think it wasn't safe to poke your head outside! Yet magically, these dangers apparently disappear with the onset of September. No one drowns, no one drinks to excess, and no one gets hurt (except for an occasional shark bite).

We get caught up in the "thank God Summer is over" hype. But as the Crocodile Hunter says, "Danger, danger, danger!" Just look at what awaits us during the 264 Non-Critical Days...

First, it's an established fact that office and school injuries skyrocket during Fall. Paper cuts and stubbed toes claim thousands of victims. Chiropractors report a two-fold increase in back injuries due to out-of-shape clients raking foliage.

Many of us fare no better during Winter. Frostbite accidents not withstanding, injuries from freak accidents abound. Last year, there were over 100 documented cases of tongues frozen to pump handles. And we need not even speak about the countless children mauled by startled reindeer.

OK, so Spring comes and we all feel safer. Not so. Only six short months ago, a group of Minnesotans lost their lives while attempting to drive an SUV over a lake to go ice fishing. Unfortunately, the lake was in Florida.

Folks, we need to be vigilant during these 264 Non-Critical Days. Too many lives are at stake. Remember, safety isn't just a concern. It's an obsession.

5.9.05

Furry Tells, Part III

Center Alley


Center Alley worse jester pore ladle gull how lift wetter stop-murder an toe heft-cisterns. Daze worming war furry wicket an shellfish parsons, spatially dole stop-murder, hoe dint lack Center Alley an, infect, word orphan traitor pore gull mar lichen ammonol dinner hormone bang. Oily inner moaning disk wicket oiled worming shorted, “Center Alley, gad otter bet, an goiter wark! Suture lacy ladle bomb! Shaker lake!” an firm moaning tell gnat disk ratchet gull word heifer wark lacquer hearse toe kipper horsing ardor, washer heft-cistern’s closing, maker bets, gore tutor star fur perversions, cooker males, washer dashes an doe oily udder hoard wark. Nor wander pore Center Alley worse tarred an disgorged!

Wan moaning, Center Alley herder heft-cisterns tucking a boarder bag boil debtor prance worse garner gift toiler pimple inner lend.

“O stop-murder,” crater ladle gull, “Water swill cerebration debt boil’s garner bay! Are sordidly ward lacquer goiter debt boil!”

“Shed dope, Center Alley,” inserter curl stop-murder, “Yore tucking lichen end-bustle! Yore nutty goring tore debt boil - armor goring tutor boil wet yore toe heft-cisterns. Yore garner stair rat hair, an kipper horsing ardor an washer pods an pens! Gore tutor boil? Hoar, hoar! Locket yore close - nosing bought racks!”

Soda wicket stop-murder any toe ogling cisterns pot honor expansive closing, an stuttered oft tutor boil, living pore Center Alley setting buyer far inner racket closing, wit tares strumming darner chicks.

Soddenly, Center Alley nudist debt annulled worming hat entity rum, an worse setting buyer site. Disk oiled worming worry furry gourd-murder.

“Center Alley, Center Alley,” whiskered dole worming, “watcher crane aboard? Ditcher wander goiter debt boil? Hoe-cake, jester goiter yore gardening an pickle bag pomp-can; den goiter yore staple an gutter bag rattletrap witch contends sex anomalous ratch. Wail, watcher wading fur? Gat goring!”

Center Alley garter pomp-can any sex bag ratch. Inner flesh, dole worming chintz door pomp-can intern anomalous, gorges, courage. Dingy chintz door sex beg ratch enter sex wide hearses. Oil offer sodden, Center Alley real-iced dashy worse warring putty an expansive closing - sulk an sadden - an honor ladle fate war toe putty ladle gloss slobbers.

Center Alley, harpy acid lurk, clammed entity gorges courage, any sex wide hearses gobbled aware tutor prance’s boil.

“O bore!” crater prance, whinny sore Center Alley, “Hoes disk putty ladle checking wetter gloss slobbers?” any win ope toe Center Alley an aster furry dense, den fur servile udders. Door prance dint wander dense wet dodder gulls - jest wet Center Alley.

Pimple whiskered, “Jest locket debt gnats-lurking cobble! Door prance sordidly enter-stance harder peck gut-lurking worming!”

Ladle Center Alley worse door bail offer boil.

Door wicket stop-murder any toe ogling cisterns wore trampling wet anchor an forestation.

“Courses, courses!” crater stop-murder. “Hoes debt ladle Manx wetter gloss slobbers? A nervous sore suture ladle horsey, any prance axe lackeys knots a barter! Lucks lackey garner dense wetter oil gnat, wile oil ware during aster set hair an kipper cheers worm! Courses!”

Oil offer sodden door cluck stork mit-gnat. Inner flesh, Center Alley’s putty closing chintz backer racks, enter pore gull hatter dasher ware firmer boil. Goring doner steers, Center Alley caked offer ladle gloss slobber. Door prance traitor casher, bought oily gut worse door slobber.

Necks moaning door Prance set: “Arm goring toe fine debt putty gull hoe worse warring disk slobber. Shale bay mar waif, debt’s fur shore, an oil bare horsebarn.”

Den, lipping honors hearse, door prance gobbled aware.

Whinny prance retched Center Alley’s horse, door stop-murder an toe heft-cisterns wandered toe traitor pot honor gloss slobber.

“Arch, arch! Ticket oft!” shorted door stop-murder, “Wart inhale yore during, Prance? Debt slobber’s toe ladle furry hormone bang! Ticket oft!”

Wile ticking offer slobber, door prance nudist Center Alley setting buyer far, any set: “Hoes debt ratchet ladle crasher? Props debt pore gull cut pot honor gloss slobber.”

Door abdominal stop-murder any toe wicket heft-cisterns bust art luffing.

“Hoar, hoar, hoar! Debt’s jest Center Alley. Yore wooden wander half suture discussing parson furry waif! Lock attar hens and phase - oil cupboard wet dart! Locket doze close - nosing bought racks!”

“Jester seam,” resplendent door prance, gadding impassioned, “arm garner traitor pot disk slobber honor ladle fort. Comb hair, Center Alley.”

Wail, bores an gulls, badger canned gas wart hopping! Center Alley tickle ladle slobber an potted earn. Den, oil offer sodden, door prance potters alms rounder ladle gull an caster - rat honor mouse!

Fur lung, wadding balls war wrangling, an Center Alley winter wear firmer wicket stop-murder’s horse, an becalm door mattress offer prance’s gorges mention. Center Alley worse jest knots aboard disk hansom horse-barn, an lift, yonder daze harpy sorghum-stenches, furry lung, lung, tam.


Mural: Ladle gulls shunt bay disgorged; warts garner hoppings garner hopping.

Furry Tells, Part II

Guilty Looks Enter Tree Beers


Wants pawn term dare worsted ladle gull hoe hat search putty yowler coils debt pimple colder Guilty Looks. Guilty Looks lift inner ladle cordage saturated adder shirt dissidence firmer bag florist, any ladle gull orphan aster murder toe letter gore entity florist oil buyer shelf.

"Guilty Looks!" crater murder angularly, "Hominy terms arena garner asthma suture stooped quiz-chin? Goiter door florist? Sordidly NUT!"

"Wire nut, murder? wined Guity Looks, hoe dint peony tension tore murder's scaldings.

"Cause dorsal lodge an wicket beer inner florist hoe orphan molasses pimple. ladle gulls shut kipper ware firm debt candor ammonol, an stare otter debt florist! Debt florist's mush toe dentures furry ladle gull!"

Wail, pimple oil-wares wander doe wart udder pimple dump wampum toe doe. Debt's jest hormone nurture. Wan moaning, Guilty Looks dissipater murder, an win entity florist.

Fur lung, disk avengeress gull wetter putty yowler coils cam tore mortised ladle cordage inhibited buyer hull firmly off beers - Fodder Beer (home pimple, fur oblivious raisins, coiled "Brewing"), Murder Beer, and Ladle Bore Beer. Disk moaning, oiler beers hat jest lifter cordage, ticking ladle baskings, an hat gun entity florist toe peck block-barriers and rash-barriers. Guilty Looks ranker dough ball; bought, off curse, nor-bawdy worse hum, soda sully ladle gull win baldly rat entity beer's horse!

Honor tipple inner darning rum, stud tree boils fuller sop - wan grade bag boiler sop, wan muddle-sash boil, and wan tawny ladle boil. Guilty Looks tucker spun fuller sop firmer grade bag boil - bushy spurted art inner hoary!

"Arch!" crater gull, "Debt sop's toe hart - barns mar mouse!"

Dingy traitor sop inner muddle-sash boil, witch worse toe coiled. Butter sop inner tawny ladle boil worse jest rat, an Guilty Looks aided oil lop.

Dingy nudist tree cheers - wan anomalous cheer, wan muddle-sash cheer, an wan tawny ladle cheer. Guilty Looks set darn inner ladle cheer, bushy worse toe bag ferret, ant soddenly bustard.

Claming upper stars tutor beer's bet-rum, Guilty Looks dish-cupboard tree bets - wan grade bag bet, wan muddle-sash bet, an wan tawny ladle bet. Failing torrid, shay flunker shelf honor ladle bet, an jester cobbler menace letter, worse sunder slip an snorting.

Inner ladle wile, donors offer cordage cam beck firmer barrier-pecking extradition, currying baskings fuller rash-barriers.

Whinny entity darning rum, Fodder Beer stuttered snuffing an grueling tomb shelf.

"Warts ban goring earn hair?" crumpled dole beer, "Conjure small psalm-sing deferent a boarder horse?"

"Crashes!" crater murder beer, ashy castor quack glands adder tipple, "Hose ban muddling wet debt sop?"

Ladle Bore Beer stuttered crayon.

"Jest locket mar ladle boiler sop - oil garbled dope! An locket mar itchy pitchy cheer - oil bustard!"

Locking adder bustard cheer, Murder Beer bay-gander gat historical, an stuttered hurling tore horse-barn:

"Brewing! Brewing! Way gut BURGHERS inner horse. HORSE BURGHERS! Quack! Coiler place! Wail, dun stun dare lacking end-bustle during nosing! Coiler Place Deportment, quack!"

"Hammer garner coiler Place Deportment wen way dun heifer toiler-fun?" resplendent Brewing, inner trampling verse. "Set darn, worming, an cape quote! Yore oil-wares thanking dare burghers inner horse!"

Oiler shame, Brewing worse jesters scarred aster udders; infect, haze niece war shagging.

Finely, Fodder Beer gutter grade bag short-gum, Murder Beer gutter muddle-sash haunting raffle, an Ladle Bore Beer gutter tawny ladle pestle, an oiler beers crypt upper stars, ware Guilty Looks worse line honor bet, sunder slip an snorting. Herring door beers, shay weakened, lipped otter door window, and dished aware harm jesters fascist shagged scrabble.

Oiler beers tar darner stars, an stuttered toe locker doers an windows.

"Fodder," aster ladle bore beer, finely, "Wart worse debt discussing crasher honor bet? Wart worse debt ogling ammonol wet oil debt yowler far honor had, an hoe dint half nor far atoll honor beck? Wart worse debt hobble lurking crasher, Fodder?"

Fodder Beer shuttered.

"Comb hair, mar bore. Heresy gut lessen furrier! Debt discussing crasher worsen HORMONE BANG! Kipper ware firm debt candor ammonol! Dare nor gut! Warts mar, are dun wander catcher goring entity florist oil bar yore shelf. Debt florist's mush toe dentures furry ladle beer!

Furry Tells, Part I

Ladle Rat Rotten Hut


Wants pawn term, dare worsted ladle gull hoe lift wetter murder inner ladle cordage honor itch offer lodge dock florist. Disc ladle gull orphan worry putty ladle rat cluck, an fur disc raison, pimple colder Ladle Rat Rotten Hut.

Wan moaning, Rat Rotten Hut 's murder colder inset.

"Ladle rat rotten hut, heresy ladle basking winsome burden barter an shirker cockles. Tick disc ladle basking tutor cordage offer groin-murder hoe lifts honor udder site offer florist. Shaker lake! Dun stopper laundry wrote! Dun daily-doily inner florist, an yonder no sorghum-stenches, dun stopper torque wet strainers."

"Hoe cake, murder," resplendent Ladle Rat Rotten Hut, end tickle ladle basking and stuttered oft.

Honor wrote tutor cordage offer groin-murder, ladle rat rotten hut mitten anomalous woof.

"Wail, wail, wail," set disc wicket woof, "Evanescent Ladle Rat Rotten Hut! Wares are putty ladle gull goring wizard ladle basking?"

"Armor goring tumor groin-murder's," reprisal ladle gull. "Grammar's seeking bet. Armor ticking arson burden barter an shirker cockles."

"Oh hoe! Heifer gnats woke," setter wicket woof, butter taught tomb shelf, "Oil tickle shirt court tutor cordage offer groin murder. Oil ketchup wetter letter, end den — oh bore!"

Soda wicket woof tucker shirt court, end whinny retched a cordage offer groin-murder, picked inner windrow, an sore debtor pore oil worming worse lion inner bet. Inner flesh disc abdominal woof lipped honor bet, paunched honor pore oil worming, an garbled erupt. Den disk ratchet ammonol pot honor groin-murder’s nut cup an gnat-gun, any curled ope inner bet.

Inner ladle wile, Ladle Rat Rotten Hut a raft attar cordage, an ranker dough ball. "Comb ink, sweat hard," setter wicket woof disgracing is verse.

Ladle Rat Rotten Hut’s entity bet rum, end stud buyer groin-murder's bet.

"O Grammar!" crater ladle gull historically, "water bag icer gut! A nervous sausage bag ice!"

"Battered lucky chew whiff, sweat hard ," setter bloat-Thursday woof, wetter wicket small honors phase.

"O Grammar, water bag noise! A nervous sore suture anomalous prognosis!"

"Battered small your whiff, doling," whiskered dole woof, ants mouse worse waddling.

"O Grammar, water bag mouser gut! A nervous sore suture bag mouse!"

Daze worry on-forger-nut ladle gull's lest warts. Oil offer sudden, caking offer carvers an sprinkling otter bet, disc hoard-hoarded woof lipped own pore Ladle Rat Rotten Hut an garbled erupt.

Mural: Yonder nor sorghum stenches shut ladle gulls stopper torque wet strainers.

1.9.05

Green Eggs And Spam

Uh-oh....

Master Doh-San over at The Empty Mind got spammed yesterday. I wish I knew how those idiots do that, so I could turn the tables. For now, though, I'm going to leave the Word Confirmation thing turned off. But if I ever get spammed.... there'll be hell to pay.

The idea of public executions for spammers has a certain appeal. Napoleon once said that every once in a while, you have to shoot a few admirals, to keep the rest in line.